October 10th, 2005



.... My boyfriend just hit a nerve that I didn't even realize was still there. It sort of scared me. Now some of my reaction may be due in part to PMS, but still, I was shocked at how hurt I felt.
I was telling him about how when I was in the fifth grade, one little girl had it out for me and decided it would be funny to pick on me. She'd manage to get behind me in line and stick nasty signs on my back, and the teacher, on more than one occassion had to pull it off. His response, (now mind you, I really do honestly think he meant it in jest) was "What are you retarded, you didn't feel a sign on your back?". My response was to promptly burst into tears, and get really upset. I STILL feel really hurt from the comment. He said he thought I'd be over that particular insecurity by now. I, in part, agree with him. It was in fifth grade. It was almost 15yrs. ago. I SHOULD be over that little incident by now. But his comment still really upset me. And not in a "I'm mad at you" sort of way, I was just really hurt, almost like he'd been right there picking on me with her. He appologized and everything.... and I'm not mad at him. I'm just feeling VERY insecure all of a sudden.
I don't like it. No sir, I don't like it one bit.